7 Things You Should Never Say to Someone Who is Suffering

Do you know someone who is suffering? Maybe they're sick, unemployed, heartbroken, or grieving. There are countless reasons that people suffer, and there are just as many ways people cope with that suffering. One way is to try to find light in the darkness. Everyone has their own way of coping. But there are certain things you should never say to someone who is suffering. We want to share with you the things you should never say to someone who is suffering.

1. You are both going to be ok

Saying that everything is going to be okay does not help the person who is suffering. In fact, it can make them feel like their experiences and emotions are not valid. Nobody knows exactly what the future holds, so pretending like everything is going to be just fine can invalidate what the person is currently feeling. It is better to acknowledge their emotions and let them know that you are there for them.

2. It's only a matter of time

It's hard to know what to say when someone is going through a tough time. On the one hand, you want to be supportive and comforting. On the other hand, you don't want to make things worse by saying the wrong thing. One thing you should never say is "It's only a matter of time." This phrase implies that the person is going to die soon, and is not really a comfort. Other phrases you should avoid include "This is for the best" and "It's better this way." These phrases may be true, but they don't really help the person who is suffering. Instead, try to be supportive and understanding. Let the person know that you are there for them, and that you care.

3. At least it's not cancer

No one wants to hear that their problem isn't as bad as someone else's. When someone is suffering, they just want to feel heard and supported. Comparing their situation to someone else's isn't helpful and is only going to make them feel worse. So what can you say instead? Just be there for them. Listen to them, console them, and let them know that you're there for them. You don't need to say anything else.

4. What do you need?

It's not easy to see someone you care about go through a tough time. And it's even harder when you don't know what to say or do to help. So often, we resort to clichés or platitudes that don't actually help. If you're not sure what your friend or loved one needs, just ask them. Simple questions like "How can I help?" or "What do you need?" can make all the difference. Don't be afraid to be direct and honest—your loved one will appreciate your candor.

5. Will you ever be able to have kids?

No one wants to hear this question, so don't ask it. Period. There's no right or wrong answer to this question, and you're not doing the person any favors by asking. In fact, you might just make them feel worse. So, unless you're extremely close to the person and you know that they're open to talking about it, don't bring it up.

Conclusion:

Even if you're just trying to help, there are a lot of things you can say that can make someone feel worse or dismissed. Sometimes the best thing you can do is nothing at all – sometimes silence helps people open up more than anything else. If it's your loved one who's going through a hard time, offer support but don't push for details they may not be ready to give. If it's somebody close to you experiencing something difficult and they turn to you for help, then try your best not to judge them on their decisions about how they cope with pain and instead respect their requests as much as possible.